Infertile Mommy???

So I was asking myself the other day am I still infertile even though I have a child?

I suffered through infertility for many years and thankfully we were able to bring home our rainbow baby.  Now that we are talking about a second child I think about all the struggles I had but have a child.

In what world do I belong…if I talk about it to women struggling with infertility with children I get the at least you have one baby and those mom’s that have children and can easily have others do not understand the struggle.

Its such a strange place where I have fears and struggles like any other person struggling with PCOS/Infertility as well as balancing being a mother.

Its a weird place to be in when you have these feelings that you are alone and nobody understands what you are going through.

Its a dark place where you feel like what if you are not able to be blessed again.

Its a cold place where you want to have all the hope & faith like you did when you were struggling.

Its a jealous place.  I am jealous of women who can get pregnant naturally after having a baby because their cycle magically return and normalize.

Its an empty place because you want to belong to a group that seems to not exist.

Its a place. My place…but hopefully for not too long.





My name is Cindy

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Posted in IVF, IVF/Infertility, Motherhood, TTC
One comment on “Infertile Mommy???
  1. Megan says:

    Omg this is EXACTLY how I feel. I’ve been asking myself the exact same questions, and it’s such a confusing place to be in. I’m not at a point where I know for sure if I want a second child, but I feel like it’s not a set of emotions that people easily understand.

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